2015 the year of awesome

So i don’t know if i completely agree with New Year resolutions, i mean we should change our lives for the better regardless of the date, but in saying that if thats the kick start you need then by all means make those resolutions! I always start the year off with a little mantra “i will be a better, wiser, more resilient human” and that to me means, taking no bullshit, culling negativity from my life, and trying to be as positive as possible. Some days are hard, and that little dark cloud of negativity creeps in, maybe you’re tired, or someones comment has been taken the wrong way, its that time of the month etc. And to be honest, i’ve started 2015 a bit grouchy and a small can’t be fucked attitude. And i can’t put my finger on why. Is it the humid weather we’ve had, the fact that it was a full moon this week? OR am i just having a moment of being a bitch? Or is it because i work in hospitality and i have a small pang of jealousy of people on holiday? Or is the fact my squeaky clean diet hasn’t been as tight over the last couple of weeks? I had booze, i had sugar, and unbeknown to me some gluten in there somewhere. With that last sentence i typed its now explained why i’ve been a cow. Food. Bloody food. Working in hospo over xmas/nye period is FULL ON, especially working in a tourist destination, when its busy we don’t have the chance to sit down have a leisurely lunch break, its basically here’s some food, shove it in your face hole. No time to chew, no time to stare out the window contemplating your navel. ITS JUST EAT TEH FRICKEN FOOD! soooo to me that meant eating Gluten Free sandwiches which in theory sound ok, i mean i filled them with good fats and protein, BUT theres bloody soy in GF bread. And soy is right up there for me with my allergens, so that means bloating and candida coming back and saying a quick hello, also being high in carbohydrates means i’ve craved sugar, but that sugar has been from nectarines, bananas and apricots. Its so funny, i remember when i first got candida, it was a fucking nightmare, i was distraught, and i chatted to a “health profession” (i use this term ever so lightly, as they know a bit but don’t follow what they preach, and are FAR from healthy) anyway this person mentioned that “after a few months your diet can go back to normal” what a load of shit. What i’ve discovered is candida isn’t as simple as a couple of months of good eating. Its a load more complex that! I don’t think of my body as been broken but its been nearly 5 months of trying to get my health on track. In that time, i’ve lost 10kgs, quite effortlessly, still have a wee bit to go, but the weight loss isn’t the focus for me. Because 2015 is the year of feeling AWESOME, being AWESOME, and settling for nothing but AWESOME. So i start 2015 with an attitude of can do, saying goodbye to the candida (again) and live life the best i can.

Environment, just as important as diet i reckon!

I’ve learnt over the last 6 or so months, diet just isn’t enough for health. You can eat all the organic veges in the world, but if you live in a shitty environment you’re just throwing away your hard earned cash and still heading for an early grave… Now when my beloved far too intelligent husband started talking about changing our environment i was all like “whut the hey” what does this even mean. How can environment play an even bigger part of wellbeing and health than diet? I mean diet and exercise fix us right?? Well i’ve learnt thats just not the case, i’ve gotten healthier by firstly environment, followed by diet and you know what? Exercise doesn’t even really enter the equation. That freaking you out?? Lets chat about exercise, i constantly move all day (working in hospo) I’m in the ocean 3-7 days a week, and i skate 3 kilometres every week. AND THATS IT! And i’ve managed to loose 10 kilos. Of course my diet is pretty much in check with no shitty processed crap and a sweet FA sweets, but the weight started to shift when we changed things in our environment.

1) Blue Light… Blue light (i.e. tv, computer, smart phone etc) completely fucks up your circadian rhythms which is paramount for good health, so to combat detriment blue light whilst still living in 2015 and enjoying technology we’ve changed a couple of small things. Firstly we have flux on our computers and smart phones, and from about an hour before sunset we wear blue blocker glasses, the glasses are fucking ugly and somewhat remind me of rave days in the 90s BUT they have totally helped with unwinding at the end of the day and not feeling wired from too much blue light and then not being able to sleep which leads me to…

2) Sleep… The old saying you can sleep when you’re dead, well hey buddy if you don’t get much sleep now, you’ll be dead before you know it so heres an idea get some fucking rest!! Im so peeved off for not taking full advantage of nap time as a child, why the hell was it sooooooo depressing to get the arvo kip? If i could go back in time id tell miniature me to lap it up. Enjoy the mother fucking nap… In our house, its pretty rare to get less than eight hours sleep a night. We make an effort to rest and recover from our day of hard work, and i defiantly can say thats a huge reason why I’ve recovered so fast from candida.

3) WIFI… well it just doesn’t exist in our house. End of story. I sleep so much better from not having it in the house. Don’t want to live in a microwave.

4) The ocean… Im in the water at least 3 times a week no matter the season. I feel recharged and grounded from my ocean dips. Spirtually and physically i feel amazing. The ocean is such a great healer. It centres me and washes away all my worries.

5) Negative people… this is something i just can’t deal with. We’re all known to moan and bitch from time to time, but theres just those people out there that cry victim. First world problems can do all our heads in, but shit is only escalated by negative attitudes, and that energy they expel is draining. You know that person that just doesn’t see how magical life is, only chooses to see the dark clouds not appreciate the beauty of the sun shining thru or the rainbow thats being created by gloomy skies. Everyday be thankful of something in your life! Starting with positivity makes a huge difference, get rid of nasty vibes, i defiantly limit my time with people like that. Because bad attitude gets you absolutely no where. And i hate feeling like someone has raped my soul.

So thats a few things we’ve done to change, I aint no doctor but shit these things have made me feel real good.

Finding your tribe

I’ve been lucky enough to find the most amazing naturopath in my area, i think of her as an earth mother that has been on this planet before. Understanding, inspiring and heck she just gets it. One thing she said to me in a consultation was along the lines of “we all need to find our tribe”

Now that really got my brain going, tribe is such a spiritual way of describing friendship/family and belonging. It made me think about how lucky i am with the tribe that i’ve got. It may be scattered all over australia and the world, but shit i really think I’m the luckiest gal on the planet. Having a tribe means good health. Friends and family that lift you and encourage, not belittle or be jealous of who you are and what you’ve got or haven’t got, to me that equates to healthy living. I’ve learnt as i’ve got older to only surround myself with people that are positive, enjoy life, love adventure and won’t settle for second best. I love meeting new people and sharing the stories of my beautiful friends, that are talented musicians, own cafes, help plan the beautiful cities we live in, travel the world chasing their dreams,jewellery makers, sculptors, writers, bakers, baristas, health professionals and i could go on forever. My friends are my chosen family who have seen me at my best and embraced me in my worst. Im lucky to say the that besties i have, have been exactly that for years. And i guess that now makes me fussy about who I’m letting into my tribe, i’ve learnt that having common interests ain’t enough, it needs to be on a spiritual level, that connection of holding eye contact and feeling energy zoom between two souls. Eep! its so exciting. But also can be sad, that moment where i guess theres almost an air of desperation for people to get along, to “hit it off” especially as you get older, but you know what I’m embracing the fact that i won’t settle for sub-par friendships. I’ve been lucky enough to bond with a few beautiful humans in Torquay, and also i guess rub a couple of people the wrong way, but i’ll never apologise for who i am as person. Because you know what? I fucking love who i’ve become as an adult, i feel strong, i know I’m borderline crazy, and adventurous and not scared to ruffle feathers. I call that living passionately! Question what people have to say, fight for what you believe in, never roll over because its easy. There should be sparks in our eyes, fire in our belly and a smile so big on your face, that people wonder what the fuck you’ve been up too!

Just a quick little rant

I just finished reading a go to “paleo” blog. This blog has over 10K followers on instagram, gives out health advice willy nilly (but with a disclaimer off course) and fucking contradicts itself over and over. One blog post i read was about basically shoving paleo down your friends throats, and how they gave a friend advice on our they DON”T NEED TO TAKE PROBIOTICS EVERYDAY and that kefir would fix them up. Hey dumbfuck lemme tell ya, my diet shits all over most humans, but I MOTHER FUCKING NEED TO HAVE PROBIOTICS TO FIX MY SHIT UP! How can an “expert” with no qualifications think thats acceptable??? quote from blog

“Recently I caught myself telling a friend that taking a capsule of pro-biotics daily was plain useless, why didn’t she just make her own kefir instead? I even threw in a suggestion about making kefir-smoothies part of her daily breakfasts…! Yeah, I know. Ridiculously Paleo Police-ish, right? Sometimes it’s best to live by example. Anyone who is ready for your advice will ask for it in their own time. Meanwhile, keep your Paleo Police-badge nice and shiny, you never know when it might come in handy next… ”

I can tell ya that my probiotics I’m taking aren’t plan “useless”. I mean are you a naturopath? A qualified health professional with years of experience? Just because you have podcasts and have read Marks Daily Apple does not mean you’re up for giving out “advice” this has really rattle my chain. On this same blog theres an article shaming paleofied desserts (which i agree with 100%) treats should be exactly that. A TREAT! a once a fortnight, or when you’re dying with PMS, not everyday just because its “healthy” cause ya know what? IT AINT! its still full of sugar and will spike the crap out of your insulin. But back to the original moan… 5 or 6 blogs down was a recipe for sponge cake. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?? Dear annoying blog what are you? I know we all evolve and learn about healthy food but to contradict yourself in a matter of months, i just don’t get it. Heres an idea, fight your own battle, share your experiences with people that want to hear it, but if you don’t have the qualifications dont dish out detrimental health advice. No two cases are the same, do you know a persons genetic makeup? previous health (both physical and mental) in their lifetime? Know their allergies? Know what exercise is best for their build up, just because you can’t digest rice doesn’t mean its evil for the whole population. get where I’m coming from?? So if theres not an MD MAHS etc etc after your name, remember that “advice” is more an opinion.

How my body has changed in 12 weeks


IMG_7301.JPGI can’t get over how much my body has changed in 12 weeks. The picture on the left is the  biggest i’ve ever been in my life i think, well at the least the most boated. I look at that picture and all i see is obesity, sadness and inflammation. The picture on the right, reminds me off hope and happiness and a bright healthy future. I’ll be honest the weight loss is awesome, but its actually the way i feel that outweighs the weight loss. Having energy again, and rebuilding my confidence is amazing. Its going to be a long fucking road, but hey i’m gonna embrace every moment, and enjoy new adventures like swimming by myself in the ocean (did that for the first time today). Its so weird, but Josh and i have been swimming in the ocean 2-3 times a week even in winter. The water is lip tremoring cold in winter, but the scariest thing about doing it, was being overweight and walking into the water feeling exposed in just bathers, and now i can walk with my head a bit higher. With the healthy changes, i find that my posture has changed, not sure if thats from inflammation  disappearing or confidence surging out of me. Either way I’m fucking loving it. Im trying not to think of my body being broken, but more so on a super duper new adventure of healthy fats and telling sugar to shove off. Who knows what my body will transform into over the next 6 months, but i can’t wait to see how shiny i become.

Where to start…

AUGUST 22 2014, now thats a date thats going to stick in my head for a very long time… And the reason for that is, that was the day my life changed… FOR THE BETTER! I know that opening sentence sounds very dramatic, and for about a month, i felt like my life had been turned upside down, twisted sideways then shat on by a monkey! That was the day i found out all my fucking allergies. NO EGG, NO GRAINS, NO ROSEMARY,NO MILK, NO SOY, NO ONIONS, NO GARLIC AND NO SUGAR! That was the day i also decided to give up smoking. I’d never been a hard core smoker, could go days if not weeks without smoking, but that was the day that enough was enough. Finding out i couldn’t eat eggs is every Paleo eaters worst nightmare, the grains, well that easy, soy mmm kinda ok (no wonder my face was so fucking swollen whilst i was in Japan) no onions and garlic was to be avoided for only 2 months, so I’m back on that band wagon. Now sugar…

The allergy test came back that i also had candida. So the first thing to go is sugar. Candida thrives on that shit, to the point where cravings are out of control to fuel the yeast growth in your stomach. So i started a full on candida elimination diet, just veges, meat, and limiting my carbs to under 10-15gms a day. Basically a ketogenic diet. It took willpower to a whole new level. My body was in turmoil, stomach cramps, mood swings, nausea, almost fluro green poos, hot flushes, feeling dehydrated no matter how much water i drank. Its been a long hard road, i actually found the first 28 days really easy to stick to the diet, and now i treat myself every now and again (and that is the occasional raw treat, very occasional! A glass of wine here or there, Or some gluten free toast) And even those better option treats make me feel like shit. In 3 months, my body has run a roller coaster, but i’ve kinda enjoyed it. I know that sounds weird, but i never really knew how broken i really was, until i’ve started to feel so alive again! It was similar to the feeling of when i first started eating “paleo” 3 years ago. But now i’ve learnt a butt load more about health, and when and how you should eat (paleohacked i guess) and also its not just diet, but also environment that makes a huge difference in health. So even tho i thought eating simple paleo was good for me, it just wasn’t enough. I could never figure out why i couldn’t loose weight, i’d lost 5-8kgs from eating simple paleo, but it kept fluctuating. It wasn’t until we moved to the beach, did we really concentrate on our surroundings. Small things like, getting rid of wifi in the house, using flux on the computers, wearing blue blocker glasses at night, drinking and cooking with only pure filtered water, swimming in the ocean at least 3-4 times a week (CT), fun exercise only once or twice a week, making sure i get at least 8hrs sleep a night, cell phone set to flight mode at bedtime, eating a fuckload of seafood (especially oysters). Teamed up with my candida diet, I’m fucking flourishing! I feel amazing again, i know i still have a wee bit to go, i reckon it’ll be another 9 months of being dedicated to my health and environment.

Im lucky enough to be married to a legend, whose knowledge blows my mind on a daily basis, i couldn’t have down it without him and also my amazing naturopath Anita. They’re a duo that are fighting the good cause of me being healthy!!

So my goal now is to keep this blog up. Get my creative juices flowing again, and bore the crap outta the 5 people that read my shit!

And im back!



Its been yonks since i’ve had the time to sit down and write/type, and a shit load has happened since my last post! Josh and i have relocated towns. Moved from Bendigo in country Victoria to Torquay for seaside living. To a lot of people this came as a shock and a rushed decision, but to us this had been in the pipeworks for ages, maybe even years. As a kiwi that grew up around water, i found living in Bendigo hard. I love the slow paced lifestyle, being able to get to work within ten minutes, but what i struggled with was my energy levels felt stagnant from lack of moving water and ocean. So no matter how healthy my diet was i still felt meh. And when we had a killer heat wave early this year, that was the nail in the coffin, there was no where to cool off, im the kind of chick that only likes moving water, so the idea of going to a dam or lake grosses me out. Im not bashing Bendigo, but its just not the right town for me. Josh still commutes to Bendigo for work in the clinic he’s spent years setting up. So it’ll always be part of our lives, and he’ll continue to make a difference in peoples lives through health.


Now new beginings in Torquay! Where do i even start! Apart from battling a kick arse flu at the moment, my energy levels have soared since moving down to the coast. And in the last 3 weeks, i haven’t craved sugar or carbs at all. Been craving foods like sardines, and calamari, which is nothing to complain about!! We’ve upped our seafood intake dramatically, and i feel amazing. A few months back i discovered that red meat is not my best mate, so my diet was pretty boring eating a lot of chicken, and a little bit of fresh seafood. But down here it’s easier to get kai moana (seafood), there’s a wholesale fish supplier only a ten minute drive from our house, where we’ve frequented often! Grabbing kilos of port arlington muscles, coffin bay oysters, calamari and snapper (schnapper!!). I’ve tried to get to the ocean everyday to stand in the water and re-charge, the walks along the beach are soul warming and energising! Our dogs Molly and Remington have never been happier, Molly is so happy she starts to froth at the mouth after 5 mins at the beach (we never have normal animals!) The best thing i’ve learnt from moving here is to relax, and not feel like i have to go a million miles per hour, or feel guilty there’s washing or house work to do. Fuck that. I’ve also bought tracksuit pants, now thats HUGE for me. As a wannabe 50s pinup girl the idea of tracksuit pants grossed me out, but now i understand the love of them, sooooo comfy!! Purely for beach walks of course!! If i start wearing them with UGGs in public someone needs to sit me down and give me a stern talking too! But all in all moving here has been the best decision Josh and i have made.

So i guess i’ll be frequenting the blog more often, as ive been spending a buttload of time in the kitchen whipping up treats and delighful meals. And there’ll probably be a stack of beach view photos!

Update time

I’ve really picked up my game in been super healthy since my last post, but most especially in the last 7 days. This last week i’ve eaten strict paleo, with my only vice being a small (and i mean tiny) piece of dark chocolate every second night. I’ve replaced my breakie with a green smoothie, i make about a litre of the vege overload and sip it throughout the morn… Gone are the cafe lattes and they’ve been replaced with long blacks. The smoothies have given my metabolism a huge shake up, since monday i’ve lost 2 inches off my waist (so all up 3 inches in nearly a month). I’ve got to be honest the smoothies aren’t the most delightful things, but they’re not offensive. I’ve been having

2 handfuls of spinach

cup of blueberries

stalk of celery

whole lemon (peel off)

knob of ginger

2 glasses of water

chuck it all in the thermomix, on speed 10 for 1-2mins and voila! This literally keeps me full for 4-5hours, and I’m not in a sedentary job, as a barista I’m on my feet for 9 hours a day. The results are fucking unreal!! And because change has happened so fast I’m more determined than i ever have been. My energy levels have doubled and i just feel happier. And the added bonus of weight loss is the cherry on the top (of coconut ice-cream but of course)

Usually by my weekend i’m rooted, so emotionally depleted and physically exhausted from working in hospo (don’t get me wrong, i love my job, its just demanding) but today being the start of my weekend , i’ve been buzzing around cooking, prepping and cleaning, usually i’d plant my arse on the couch and smash out a tv series! The joy of falling off the wagon and getting back on it, is the initial high from fuelling your body with the best possible food. Its contagious! Fuck feeling like shit ever again… This is defiantly a new me!

Soooooo go paleo if you know whats good for ya!

Yip, i am still alive

Well this year is just flying by, i can’t believe we’re in October already. Totally scary. So all in all its been a rollercoaster ride to keep paleo this year. There’s been good weeks, followed by bad months. I can’t put my finger on why its been so difficult to healthy. I mean shit, i KNOW i’ve had a better diet than previous years, but the sugar demon has been rampant this year. But as the days get longer, its seems easier to eat healthy, as that burst of VIT D is a real inspiration for health (or just a sharp realisation that hotter temps means less clothes, and less clothes means dimply fatty bits are out and about on show) If you’re a follower of my rambles you’ll know that im not about being skinny, im all for glowing healthy skin and mental clarity, and slimming down is just a bonus. But heck that summer feel defiantly makes you want to up the anti!

2013 has also been a struggle to find an exercise regime that inspires me. So after fighting a huge inner demon, i sucked up my fear and went along to Roller Derby freshmeat tryout. After a 3 year hiatus, it was a pleasant suprise to still be able to skate and enjoy every second! It was such a huge mental hurdle to step/skate back on the track. The last time i was doing “derby” it ended bad, and “smylin Assassin” was retired. I still have a mini freak out about being back, and i’ve only been a handful of times in 6 weeks, but im liking it and feeling brave, and also feel like a huge chapter of my that was haunting me has been closed yet re-opened in a nice way, i feel like ive matured. Which that in itself is scary!

So as i type this, my mantra thats going through my head is “fuck j, no more sugar, sugar is evil, sugar tastes like shit”, so back to the beginning i go, telling myself this time will be different, and you know what? I reckon it will be! So i’ll be back here rambling on about my life and my cockups. And general life crap! And wish me luck, but i think this time i’ll be more successful than ever before!